The Golden Game

We Wus Robbed!!

The World Cup 2006

Between 1930 and 1970 the world cup was originally called the Jules Rimet trophy, after the French lawyer who paid for it, and it was made out of gold plated silver - there obviously wasn't as much money to leech by practicing law then as there is now. The cup was pinched from a postage stamp exhibition in London in 1966, which probably hastened the death of the FA chairman Joe Mears, who was dead within weeks of a heart attack. The cup was then found by a dog called Pickles - this is all absolutely true, honestly - which became a celebrity with it's own agent, starred in a film and then tragically strangled itself with it's own lead whilst attempting to ravage a cat, not much different from the tragic ends of several human actors. Not long afterwards the thief, an ex-soldier called Betchley died in prison. In 1970 the Brazilians were the champions for the third time so they were presented with the trophy to keep permanently; but undeterred by it's grisly past South American criminals proved to be a lot better than their English counterparts and stole it again in Rio, and it has never been seen since. No doubt it now acts as a chamberpot in the gracious and tasteful residence of some Russian billionaire or other. Yet another one was made, this time called the FIFA world cup (from Fédération Internationale de Football Association; why did we allow a French name of all languages when we English invented the sport?) this time in solid gold with a malachite base, football having come a long way from the £20 a week maximum wage by then.

England won it in 1966 which at the time of writing this was 22 years ago, almost as long as it's been since Manchester City last won a major trophy and probably as long as it will be before they grab another. Oh, and was this website about the 2006 tournament? We were robbed as usual and the Italians proved that they are still the best divers in the world. Since when, of course, we've seen the Italian football bribery scandals; 'nuff said.

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